Crystal Tears From The Heart
by Kat Lee formerly Pirate Turner
Summary: When the mysterious Crystal sets out to confront Angel, she doesn't realize she'll be walking right into the arms of the man she dares not love -- although she already does. Follows the author's Musical Bonding, Love and Karaoke, and Please Don't Go.


Title: "Crystal Tears From The Heart"  
Author: Pirate Turner  
Rating: PG  
Summary: When the mysterious Crystal sets out to confront Angel, she doesn't realize she'll be walking right into the arms of the man she dares not love -- although she already does.  
Warnings: Het  
Word Count (excluding header): 2,994  
Disclaimer: Lorne, Charles Gunn, Wolfram and Hart, and Angel are & TM their respective owners, not the author, and are used without permission. Crystal Frost and her babies are & TM the author, Pirate Turner, and may not be used without permission. The lyrics come from David Bowie's As The World Falls Down and are & TM Bowie and any/all other respective owners, none of which is the author, and are used without permission. The author makes absolutely no monetary profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.

She shouldn't be here, and she knew it. Her heart pounded fearfully in her throat, and her ice blue eyes glanced all around at the strangers, expecting the one man who she knew so well to emerge from them and pounce upon her at any second. She kept her head held high and her back straight, but she knew the scent of her fear would give her away. He would smell it and then the familiarity, and he would be upon her like a moth on a flame.

She would not stand a chance in trying to run from him with so many on-lookers of such questionable ethics, but then she couldn't run from him regardless. She had to face him. She had to tell him what she had come here to tell him, no matter how much it angered him or if it killed whatever might remain of their relationship were her life any better than what it was.

She squared her shoulders, chin high, eyes resolute. She would tell Angel. She hoped he would understand. If he didn't, so be it, but she would not give up. She could not give up. She had had no choice but to remove herself from his life, but she would not let him cave to what Wolfram and Hart undoubtedly had in store for him. She could not completely abandon him, though she should.

She moved stealthily through the crowd, her every sense on high alert. She knew he would be furious, and he had every right to be. She knew he would never understand why she had done what she had done, and she no longer expected him to. She expected him at every turn, but the first sign of recognition she received was anything but what she expected, or rather, whom.

Her breath caught in her throat as, through the midst of people and heart-hammering fear, she saw him. Her first instinct was to duck, turn around, and run, but she knew it was too late as, over the distance, his yellow eyes, which always managed to enchant her with but one glance, caught her gaze. Everything in her body stilled in that moment. Deep down, she knew she should still try to run, but her brain could not even function well enough to command her feet.

There's such a sad love  
Deep in your eyes, a kind of pale jewel  
Open and closed within your eyes

Beginning strands of a familiar song caught her ears as he moved toward her, the people parting as though they were but extras in a dream that suddenly had no more need to be there. Her brain finally kicked in and screamed at her to run, but her whimpering heart kept her feet still. Her breathing started again, labored and panicked, and tears sprang to her blue eyes. She couldn't allow this to happen! She had to run from him! She had to protect him!

But there he was, holding out his hands to her, his eyes begging her not to go as he sang along with the Goblin King, his sensual voice seductively caressing her ears. "I'll place the sky within your eyes." How could he know it was her? she wondered, her blue eyes frantically searching his yellow orbs from behind her sparkling mask. After all this time and despite the masks they both wore, how could he know? Yet there was no doubt in her mind that he did know.

Her hesitation held out as her brain warred with her heart, and soon, too soon and yet not soon enough, he was standing immediately before her. "Please," he whispered in a breath choked full of emotions, "just one dance?" Right arm folding underneath his chest, he bowed slightly, his eyes never leaving hers while his left hand held high before her, shining, green palm up.

There's such a fooled heart  
Beating so fast in search of new dreams

She should say no. She should run. But there had always been something especially magical about All Hallow's Eve, something that made lovers foolish, and though she could never be his lover, or any one's, he was the only one she knew she would ever want in that special way. Her heart hammered even more fiercely than before as her white hand slid onto his green palm. She noticed, for the first time, how well-manicured his fingernails were as his hand closed around hers.

A love that will last within your heart  
I'll place the moon within your heart

She fought against the instinct to run, but her troubled mind was soon startled into silence as the fingers on his left hand entwined with her own and he touched her shoulder with his right hand. He cupped her shoulder, rubbed her softly, and slid his hand slowly down her body to cup her back. Then he pulled her against him, and her eyes went wide from the sensations that shot like quicksilver through her body.

"No questions," he promised, "just for tonight." He started to sway with her in time to the music, and Crystal caved, allowing her body to dance to the words she knew so well even as her mind started up again. The world was falling down around her, it seemed, as reality threatened to come to a screeching halt as he danced her slowly across the floor. Regardless, his world would come to a screeching halt and fall down all around him if she stayed.

As the pain sweeps through  
Makes no sense for you  
Every thrill has gone  
Wasn't too much fun at all  
But I'll be there for you  
As the world falls down

She pulled against him; he held tight. "Just one dance," he whispered again, his handsome face but an inch from her own, "please." His yellow orbs begged her, and she had not the heart to refuse. How much harm could one dance do? Surely Frostbite would not find her so swiftly here, despite so many of his cohorts being so close. They couldn't know who she was as she hid behind a mask, and none of them had ever seen her before. They couldn't know to call his evilness.

Falling  
(As the world)  
Falling down  
Falling in love

"Just let it go," he whispered. "You're safe here." She knew he'd never understand that nowhere was safe for her, let alone for him to be with her, but then her thoughts shattered as he moved boldly closer. Her heart nearly leapt out of her throat as he placed a gentle kiss, as soft as the petals of a rose, against her cheek. She'd never been touched like this before. Lorne's hands felt like velvet, and her body thrilled at his tiniest touch. She wanted more of him. She needed more, but as always, she could have neither what she wanted nor needed, only what she could survive on -- except for this one dance.

I'll paint you mornings of gold  
I'll spin you Valentine evenings  
Though we're strangers till now  
We're choosing the path between the stars  
I'll leave my love between the stars

{Shut up,} she growled to her brain, and then concentrated on ignoring it and focusing instead on Lorne, his gentle touches, the motion of his body swaying against hers, and the enchanting gaze in his yellow orbs. Most women would have screamed and ran from the sight of yellow eyes, but Crystal found them completely enthralling. She had never seen anything so . . . The word wasn't beautiful. It couldn't be beautiful, she thought; after all, Lorne was most certainly a man. Enchanting, mysterious, sensual. They all fit, and though she'd never dare tell him, she couldn't help thinking beautiful did, as well.

It most certainly fit his voice for that was as sensual as the rest of him and as rich and beautiful as liquid gold. It sent shivers sweeping through her being, and she had no doubt he meant every word he sang. Unfortunately, she also had no doubt that such could never be, no matter how much she would love to be able to spend not only Valentine evenings but every evening for the rest of her life just like this, wrapped in his arms and drowning in the soul she saw reflected in his eyes.

As the pain sweeps through  
Makes no sense for you  
Every thrill has gone  
Wasn't too much fun at all  
But I'll be there for you  
As the world falls down

He moved against her, and her body was caught up in delicious thrills unlike anything she'd ever felt before. His hands caressed her, even his left hand getting into the act, his thumb caressing the back of her hand while never once daring to release his hold on her -- though she knew she could have easily broken it, had she the strength of heart to do so.

Falling  
(As the world)  
Falling down  
Falling

He pulled her close as the song swept on and gazed deeply into her eyes. His eyes spoke his truest, deepest emotions, and though she knew she should pull away, she simply couldn't find the strength to do what must be done. He loved her or, at least, he believed he did. She knew she felt the same about him, but it was impossible for her to tell him for to tell him would be to sign his death warrant. Frostbite guaranteed that.

As the world falls down  
Falling, falling, falling  
Falling in love  
As the world falls down  
(Down)

"No one else has ever looked at me the way you look at me, Crystal, or cared for me so quickly so easily. There's so much I want to tell you, but I don't dare for I don't want you to run. I don't know what you're running from, but please let me catch you. We can help you. We can protect you." "No," she whispered, her voice breaking on a whimper as she fought back the tears that threatened to well, "you can't. No one can."

As the world falls down  
Falling, falling, falling  
Falling in love  
As the world falls down  
(Down)

Falling, falling, falling  
Falling in love  
As the world falls down

Falling, falling, falling

A voice broke out over the crowd as the music was suddenly stopped. "You told me that too, once upon a time, Crystal, and I told you the same thing Lorne is now trying to convince you of. We argued about that many times. Then I woke up one night, and you were gone, vanished without a trace. Isn't that right?" His tone was icy cold, and though she'd expected no less than the seemingly careless anger that radiated from him, she still flinched.

Crystal whirled in Lorne's arms to see Angel standing behind her, his arms folded over his muscular chest and his face darkened with his fury. "Y-Yes," she managed. How had he gotten so close without her knowing?

She knew how. For one moment, she had forgotten all else, all but Lorne and the way he made her feel. For one brief minute in time, she had forgotten the danger that haunted her every second in this world that had turned upside down for her so many years ago, forgotten because she ached so terribly to be able to stay with Lorne, remain in his arms, and keep thrilling to his every touch. Now she remembered everything again and knew her world was going to come down once more, but this time, if she did not escape, Lorne's world and Angel's would, as well.

"You should have let me make that decision."

"You wouldn't listen to reason. I tried to get you to leave, and you refused!"

"And I'm refusing now."

"You don't have a choice."

"The Hell I don't!" Angel snarled, his fangs revealing.

"You don't," she insisted, shaking her head fiercely and sending her long, blonde hair shimmering down her back in glittering, golden waves that Lorne's fingers caught at. Her breathing picked up again. She didn't want to have to fight either of them, but they might leave her with no choice. "I can't give you one!"

"I'm not asking you to," he countered, his eyes flashing to a color that was the darkest black, and was, in truth, completely void of color. "I'm taking it," he growled savagely.

"Angel," Lorne spoke up from behind Crystal, "you never would tell me exactly what happened between you and the lady, but you'll not harm her." His hands caressed her shoulders in what was meant to be reassuring strokes as he walked around her and then in front of her. "Put the fangs away," he demanded.

"Lorne, no!"

Angel dashed forward; Lorne stood his ground. Crystal shot into the air on a circle of ice. "Crystal, please," Angel roared as he leaped, "don't do this!"

Lorne gaped up at the woman who, a brief second before, had been behind him. He knew she'd had the ability, but he found himself nearly as surprised this time as he had been the first. "Please come down! We can talk things out! We can protect you!"

The disc of ice skirted around Angel, and he fell to the floor. "Please," Crystal told them both, "try to understand. I have no choice. You can not protect me, and leaving is the only thing I can do to protect you."

"Let us decide if we need the protection!" Lorne exclaimed, knowing he stood no chance of reaching her if Angel could not.

Crystal looked down at both of them, but her eyes focused on Lorne. Tears shimmered clearly in her ice blue eyes, and she saw his own tears reflected in his yellow eyes which seemed far more now like golden orbs of emotion. "You know not what you ask," she told him with intense sadness haunting her voice.

She was terrified, he knew, and truthfully not just for herself. She believed every word she spoke and honestly felt there was no other way. He ached to make her see that they could help but knew not how. "Please don't go!" he begged again.

"I must!" She swept through the air even as the other people in the room started pulling out guns and an assortment of other weaponry.

"NO!" Angel roared. His transformation into full Vampire mode was the fastest any one in the room had ever witnessed. "NO ONE HARMS HER!" He ran through the room, flipped onto Gunn's broad shoulders, and flipped into the air again. His fingers caught the very edge of Crystal's ice, but the ice shattered instantly at his touch. He grasped for her but missed as she bent her legs in and more ice shot up to separate her from him. He fell to the floor and landed, instead of on its hard surface, on a fresh pile of snow.

"I'M SORRY!" Crystal called. "I SHOULDN'T HAVE COME, BUT I HAD TO TELL YOU, ANGEL, YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE! NEITHER YOU NOR LORNE NOR ANY OF YOUR PEOPLE SHOULD BE HERE! WOLFRAM AND HART ARE EVIL! YOU CAN NOT CHANGE THAT! I KNOW THAT MUST BE WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, BUT YOU CAN NOT! THEY ARE COUNTING ON YOU TRYING! PLEASE PULL OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!"

Mischief glinted in Angel's dark eyes as he returned, "IF YOU WERE TO STAY, PERHAPS YOU COULD CONVINCE ME OF THAT WITH TIME!"

"YOU KNOW I CAN NOT! YOU KNOW WHAT FOLLOWS ME EVERYWHERE I GO!" Her eyes gazed down into his. "IF YOU WANT TO HONOR THE ONE YOU LOVE, IF YOU WANT TO BE TRUE TO YOURSELF OR TO THE PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE IN YOU, THEN GET OUT! IF YOU JUST WANT TO LIVE, OR WANT YOUR PEOPLE TO LIVE, THEN LEAVE!"

A ladder was suddenly sat up, and Crystal's eyes flew to it, then to Angel's, and finally to Lorne's. "I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY!" she repeated, an ocean of tears flowing down her cheeks that Lorne now knew to be frostingly cold to the touch and yet somehow, simultaneously, mysteriously, warm. Her skin was cold, yet heat had shot through him every time he touched her. No one had ever made him tingle like she did. His fingers tingled again at the memory, and he longed to hold her just once more. "PLEASE DON'T GO!" he begged, dropping to his knees.

She closed her eyes, unable to face him. "I CAN'T!" She turned away, forcing her eyes to reopen, and flew toward the door only to find it barred. She shook her head and narrowly avoided the man who jumped from the ladder, his arms outstretched to catch her. They still thought they could stop her. All she wanted to do was to stay, but to do so would be to condemn them to the surest death. Ice covered the nearest wall and then exploded outward, taking the wall with it. She flew out into the night and away at the fastest speed she could muster, her tears falling down from the star-filled sky like rain.

Angel and Lorne stood side by side, watching her leave and feeling more helpless than they ever had before. Their hearts went with her, leaving them aching as though a giant hole had taken their place. At last, when she was far out of sight, Lorne turned burning eyes onto Angel. He knew more than he did about his mysterious, beautiful lady who had so completely smitten him! "What is she," he managed to ask without his voice shaking too noticeably, or at least, he hoped so, "to you?"

"She's my sister." Lorne's jaw slacked and hung slightly open despite his best efforts. "It's going to be one Hell of an interesting year," the Vampire grumbled. Angel turned away, falling immediately into one of his deepest broods ever.

Lorne watched him leave with tears filling his yellow eyes. He'd never known he could hurt more than after his mother had wanted him dead, but now, for the first time in his life, he did, and he could no more stop Crystal than he could stop the moon from shining or time's hands from turning. He was completely helpless.

**The End**


End file.
